Boy's Eye View

There was a time when our parents were actually hip. They would grease up their hair and head out for a night at the local bowling alley or disco club to get on their grooves, be-bop, pop, rock and cruise the locals.

These days are long gone now and anyone who even comes close to being classified as a thirty-plus year old is out of wack and over the hill. As the current youth generation, we must respect our elders to some degree and realize that parents often develop an affliction known as senility. This means that they no longer listen to rock and roll, they no longer eat candy and they don’t understand that letting their children stay out for a few extra hours on the weekends is a reasonable thing to do.

The fact that parents develop like this bothers me immensely. Why does this bother me, you ask? Well the answer may seem kind of strange but it’s because my little brother is thirteen years younger then me. This means that when he is seventeen, I will be a stone-age thirty-year-old. You see I don’t want to influence him in ways a parent would by acting obnoxious, listening to classical music, tellling him to come home before ten o’clock at night and generally embarassing him in front of his friends. However, when I turn thirty, I don’t know what I’ll be able to do to prevent myself from becoming senile.

I could try to wear my pants around my knees and swagger when I walk and crouch over to pretend I was a punky-ass rapper but people probably wouldn’t buy it and I might get mistaken to be a perverted old man and get incarcerated in prison for life. The second thing I could do would be to head over to the over the hill home for old folks and hit on the wrinkled babes who would be as old as me. However, then I don’t think my brother would ever come and visit me since young people don’t ever visit old folk homes.

Ultimately, this is why we must enjoy our youth as much as possible because before we all know it, middle-age will come a knockin' at our doors. So for the time being, I’ll try to keep the mind set of a young person and keep arguing with my parents, staying out late and trying to explain to my brother that I am on his side.