| Lisa "Where's Tito Puente?" Simpson | VS | Betty "Where's Archie?" Cooper |
Lisa S. (or L. Simpson) wins because she is intelligent, a talented musician, and a spirited feminist, all at eight years old! She is a pillar of intellect in her slow-witted family. Furthermore, she refuses to be like her ditzy classmates, but can still laugh at an episode of "Itchy and Scratchy." I want to be like Lisa Simpson when I grow up!
Ms. Cooper is smart, and has many skills, including auto repair (how liberating), but has spent the last fifty or so years chasing after low-life Archie Andrews! Betty and the infantile Veronica Lodge bicker and plot against each other for a guy. What a waste! Anyways, the ever-single Jughead was always the coolest dude in Riverdale. |
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Motherly Advice: Real-Life Mothers' Sayings A tribute to our moms in all their wisdom
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Inane Diet of the Month:
Frenchman Michel Montignac has created a stir in the diet world by asserting that one can enjoy fine, rich foods and still lose the poundage. How? Montignac explains how different foods interact on a chemical level why certain foods should be separated which all seems very logical.
YET, it is an inane diet because it is completely unhealthy. He unrelentingly advocates wine and chocolate with chapters called "The Blessings of Wine" and "The Marvels of Chocolate" respectively, disses fruit and only mentions physical activity in the appendix! Plus, Montignac Inc. charges exorbitant fees for their books and counselling sessions. In other words, it's a scam! Source: Dine Out & Lose Weight by Michel Montignac |
"May A Girl Run After A Man? Catlike, she may do a little stalking! But run? Not a step. The freedom of today allows her to go to meet him half-way, but the girl who runs, runs after a man who runs faster."
"When you're pretty sure he's not about to dial your number, there's just one thing to do-call him. No biggie, right? After all, the phone's familiar territory...No doubt this call's gonna take major guts, but the rewards-friendship or even a budding romance-could be worth it."
Although All About You! says it less bluntly than good old Ms. Post, they both have the same message: Don't ask guys out! Needless to say, this is an old-fashioned notion and most women of the 90's (including Mel) have accomplished this monstrous feat.
P.S. Why do new degrading, teeny magazines keep popping up? As if they weren't already dominating the media. That is so wrong!!
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